How many times you gotta be told?

Corporate America just wasn't for me. Bagholder's lone venture into corporate America was as a teenager (pre-internet days) working at a call center for a major Hotel chain. In a 2 week pay period, we would routinely handle 4000+ phone calls to get about 800 reservations. In those days, average room was $50 times 800 reservations meant each agent routinely typed up $40,000 worth of business every two weeks while getting paid about $800. As a corporate drone, I dreamt of ways to turn those 4000 calls into $40,000 for me, instead of a faceless corporation….

As luck would have it, Bagholder was working on that very problem one Friday in September just before week 1 of the NFL football season when the phone rings. Guy with a heavy foreign accent says "bet the Broncos" - and then hangs up. Most folks I know would just dismiss the call as a prank, Then laugh Sunday night when they happen to notice the Broncos won. Oh well, life goes on….

Week 2 Friday night, phone rings again - guy says "bet the Vikings" - and then hangs up. Anyone who has been on this planet for more than 10 minutes knows "If the world tells you something twice, you listen". Bagholder goes long the Vikings right here. Most normal folks at this point, would still dismiss the call as as a prank - but make no mistake; they will go looking for that Vikings score on Sunday. Sure enough the Vikings win.

Week 3 Friday, phone rings. At this point most folks would begin looking the gift horse in the mouth - with something like "WHO IS THIS?". But the voice says "Bet the Raiders" & hangs up. Most folks would still do nothing, but a healthy percentage of people would find a way to get a Benji or two down on the Raiders. Even the ones who don't bet will keep an eye on the Raiders - who of course, win.

Week 4. If you are like Bagholder, come week 4 you are sitting next to your phone waiting for the call. It comes with the words "Bet the Browns". Anyone who bet week three will be upping the sperm count this time. Those who didn't bet week three have to be questioning themselves. Some of those will rationalize along the lines of : This guy has been right 3 weeks in a row, I should try it. Browns win.

Week 5. There are people I know, who after being handed 4 winners in a row, would be emptying their checking accounts (fck the mortgage) after the phone rings with "bet the Rams". To be fair, there is a large percentage of people at this point who would still not bet the Rams, for a myriad of reasons - most of them psychological. Maybe they don't have gamble in them, or they are to lazy to make a bet, or perhaps they just do not believe. No matter, Rams win.

Week 6 Call comes "bet the Colts". Those emptying their checking accounts last week are now paying their mortgage AND pounding the Colts. The ranks of the non-believers are shrinking as more and more people, after being told 5 times in a row, begin to listen. Think about most men you know and how they would react in this situation. After being given 5 consecutive winners half the men I know would be betting the Colts - many of those would be wagering $$ well outside their comfort zones. Its OK, because Colts win.

Week 7 Call says "bet the Lions". Many guys, including yours truly, would be booking suites at Caesars Palace by week 7. Meanwhile the non-believers rationalize away the pain of lost opportunities with thoughts like: This is not possible, nobody could have information like this, why are they sharing with me, this is crazy, etc… Then again, how many times do you, as an individual, need to be told something before you listen? five, six, seven? …. Oh, Lions win.

Week 8 By now, there are some people to whom that Friday night phone call is a Religion. Their worlds revolve around that voice on the phone which says "Bet the Eagles". Some folks I know would be doubling up their bets every week, while others would now be emptying their brokerage accounts for wagering capital. Meanwhile the non believer pool shrinks some more as all but the most stubborn non-believers start to listen and bet the Eagles. Eagles win.

Week 9 Phone call comes, guy says "I've given you 8 winners in a row, I can't carry you forever - this is the last winner you get for free. Next week you wire me 10 grand or we don't talk again. Got it? Now, bet the Jets." The non believers are screaming "I knew it, its a scam, they just wanted my money". While all that may be true - the voice gave 8 winners in a row. In short, he produced. In fact, make that 9 as the Jets win.
At this point there are a couple of questions which need addressing:

What week would you climb on board?
Would you wire the money for the week 10 call?

For the record, Bagholder would wire the 10k.


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While you might think the above scenario could never happen, all that is required is a devious mind willing to make exactly 4096 phone calls week one - telling half to bet the broncos & the other half bet their opponents. Because the broncos won, come week 2 you call only the 2048 people who were tipped the "broncos" and tell half to bet the vikings & the other half to bet their opponent. Repeat until after week 9. By then you will have handed 9 winners in a row to 8 different people (some of whom have elevated you to GOD status). Assume 1/2 are astounded enough to cough up the money for a week 10 pick, and that is how you turn 4000+ phone calls into $40,000.
Disclaimer: Do not try this at home…. For the record, the above tale is complete fiction - bagholder knows nothing about the list of 5000 Gamblers Anonymous members whose phone numbers went missing back in the 80's.