To not Want is to Be …..(Lao Tzu)
Bagholder has written extensively on the seven deadly sins. There is an excellent piece here on pride and another nice article here on laziness. Today’s column will be focused on what Bagholder believes to be the most widespread of the seven deadlies; Envy. At one point or another, everyone will suffer from a bout of envy, as it’s part of the human condition. If allowed to take hold, it is as ruinous a character flaw as there is. Envy has been turning us against ourselves and others, well, since Cain killed Abel.
In Dante’s Purgatory, the envious are punished by having their eyelids wired shut. It seems an apt punishment for sinners who “derived joy from watching others brought low.” It is human nature for individuals to evaluate themselves relative to others. As such, watching someone fail, often has the perverse effect of inflating your own sense of self-worth. The Germans call it Schadenfreude, and Bagholder has been known to engage in it on occasion. For example, when it was announced the quadruple vaxxed Tony Fauci tested positive for Covid, Bagholder’s response would best be described as .… Robust laughter.
From a societal standpoint, when you consider all seven of the deadlies, envy is far and away the most destructive. Perhaps this is due to the fact envy is the one sin capable of infecting entire groups at a time. As a consequence, many of the biggest problems plaguing society today directly result from envy running rampant. Racism, class hatred, wokeism, and terrorism, just to name a few, are all societal ills stemming directly from the unequal distribution of resources and the envious attitude it fosters of “you have, I want.”
The real root cause of envy is desire. For a select few, desire can be a positive motivating factor to focus better and work harder. For most though, desire robs people of the experience of living in the present. Rather than live in the “now,” the envious are tantalized constantly with the thoughts of what they could have or what they could become (at some point in the future). This idealizing comes at the expense of embracing the goodness of what they have today. This brings with it a litany of negative feelings from deep inside, including guilt, shame, and unworthiness. Measuring your self-worth by what others have, is arguably the most direct path there is to clinical depression.
True spiritual growth, and by extension happiness, requires an inward-looking examination of self. Admittedly, scouring the deepest & darkest recesses of your soul, and figuring out why the negative feelings of unworthiness, shame, and guilt exist in the first place, is no easy task. The soul is rarely a pretty place. Most find it easier to avoid introspection altogether, and gaze outward wantingly at their neighbor’s greener appearing grass. That envious outward gaze may seem appealing, but like any Faustian bargain, the actual cost is staggering:
Please take a deep breath, and allow the following two sentences to land:
Envy hardens the heart, distracts the mind, and corrupts the soul. Simply put, you cannot grow as a human being by spending what little time you have available on planet Earth, coveting what others have.
The first step in eliminating envy is recognizing it when it rears its ugly head. Easier said than done, no doubt. Irrational feelings of hostility, and resentment toward others (who have done nothing wrong) are surefire indications of envy at work. Learn to rip those feelings out, root and stem, as they will inevitably destroy relationships.
The second step is to ”know thyself” and accept who you are, without judgment. Stop comparing yourself to others; become your own standard. Acknowledge you do not need things to be happy. Happiness is not an object to obtain; it is a by-product of appreciating who you are & what you have.
Adopting a full-time “attitude of gratitude” is the final step in crushing envy. If you can’t figure out how to take that final step, Bagholder recommends you immediately stop counting the blessings of others, and start counting your own.
💕from the heart ty
i am envious of peoples ability to write long articles, i tend to say all i want to say in a short sentence or two!
happiness is temporary for humans and always will be, dont aim for it just enjoy it when you have it